


Infinite Cherishing

by booqwu



Series: kevkyuniverse [1]
Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: M/M, haknyeon jacob and chanhee are mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-04-15
Packaged: 2020-01-14 14:09:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18477826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/booqwu/pseuds/booqwu
Summary: Time, he confirms, is Kevin Moon constantly just being, and being infinite in Changmin’s space time continuum.





	Infinite Cherishing

“You look cold.”

 

Changmin turns back from his view on the balcony to crimson hair and a boxy smile, holding out a coat and a warm cup of what he assumes is hot chocolate, as Kevin knows that Changmin doesn’t really drink coffee, and always gets a sweet drink when the friend group goes to study at cafes. 

 

Kevin knows a lot of things about Changmin.

 

“A little,” Changmin says, trying to stop the shudders that are making their escape from his body. Being easily susceptible to the cold, he should’ve known better to walk outside in the middle of winter without a coat on. He was in such deep thought that he forgot, he supposes. He also supposes that’s why he has Kevin.

 

“Come here, you goof,” Kevin says, holding out the cup and Changmin’s jacket. He takes it gratefully and throws it on his shoulders, taking the cup and sipping at it tentatively. He smiles gently at the hint of honey and cinnamon - that was the result of one night where he and Kevin were watching movies, and he stated he liked when there was more flavor in his cocoa than just chocolate. 

 

Kevin always talks about how he remembers small things about people, and Changmin can tell when he does things like this. It’s the things like when Sunwoo always gets the seat facing the door because he can’t have his back to the exit, or when he encourages Haknyeon that he is smart enough to be in college. There’s a filing cabinet in Kevin’s mind, cataloging everything he’s learned about a person, keeping it just in case he can use it later.

 

Changmin wonders how big his file is, in Kevin’s mind. 

 

“Was it too loud in there? I know it can get pretty obnoxious with Jaehyun around,” Kevin says out into the cold air, breaking Changmin’s thoughts. He sighs quietly, huddling closer to his jacket. He really should zip it up, but he is too lazy to. 

 

“A little,” Changmin agrees, “but he can’t help it. I love Jaehyun, I just-”

 

“Needed a moment of recollection?” Kevin interrupts, his smile growing softer. “You’ve done that since middle school.” Changmin closes his mouth and nods. 

 

He often forgets how long Kevin’s known him. Time is infinite, he thinks, because you could know someone for 3 days and it feel like forever compared to a friend you’ve had since you were kids. Kevin, though, contradicts these things, because he has known Kevin since they were kids, and it still feels like he known him even before he was born. 

 

Kevin is time to him, Changmin realizes, because time to him is soft lips against his scraped knee at age 3 falling off of his tricycle. Time is hands shaking at the age of 10 at the thought of a new school, and hands sliding into his own, reminding him he’s not alone. It’s crying at the age of 12, telling the most important people in his life that he’s not like the others, and he wants to kiss boys instead of girls. Time, he confirms, is Kevin Moon constantly just being, and being infinite in Changmin’s space time continuum. 

 

“You’re drifting off a lot today,” Kevin comments, coming up and placing his hand not holding his (definitely pitch black) coffee upon Changmin’s scalp, brushing any stray hairs off of his face. “Has something happened?”

 

Changmin shakes his head no, smiling gently at Kevin, as if he couldn’t do anything else. “It’s just a spacey day for me, I guess. You know how it gets.” Kevin hums in agreement, reaching down to pull Changmin close, the hand on his waist grounding him. “You’re still shaking, You really need to eat more, you know?”

 

Changmin laughs, resting his head on Kevin’s shoulder, smelling the bittersweet scent of coffee beans and cinnamon. “I know. You and Jacob never forget to tell me every single day.”

 

“We just worry, Minnie.” Kevin pulls out the old childhood nickname, and Changmin’s heart drops, then inflates like a balloon. A name, a word associated with sparklers in the summer and whispered promises under tents shielding them from the stars. 

 

“You both worry a lot,” Changmin comments, laughing quietly. Kevin huffs out a chuckle, placing his chin on Changmin’s head. “I would try to work on it. You’re going to get wrinkles.”

 

“Then eat more, and we’ll be fine,” Kevin shoots back, and Changmin rolls his eyes with a smile, placing his cocoa down and wrapping his arms around Kevin’s waist, wanting to get closer to the warmth. At this time, he thanked his body for being so damn small. Kevin replies with a smile, pulling the jacket over them more. 

 

“Are you still cold? Do you need me to get your gloves or something?” Kevin asks, talking into his hair. Changmin shakes his head, burrowing himself more into Kevin.

 

“No. Just you is enough.” A sentence that holds more than one meaning. 

 

Kevin sighs and squeezes Changmin tighter, looking out onto the forest that spreads below them. It was Jacob’s idea to rent a house in the mountains and spend their winter break there with the friend group that formed in high school, and have stuck together since. Changmin likes nature, so he agreed. He loves them all to pieces, but Changmin isn’t extroverted like Haknyeon and can be around people constantly. That’s why after a while, he snuck outside to look at the stars, and take everything in. 

 

“Have you thought about my offer at all?” Kevin breaks the silence, and Changmin stops breathing. He knows very well the offer, a trembling Kevin walking up to him with a smile to match and told him he had romantic feelings for him. Changmin malfunctioned and ran, breaking Kevin’s heart. They didn’t talk for a week after that, and it hurt Changmin more than he liked to think. Kevin is constant and familiar, and not having that available felt like an amputee’s ghost limb, not having it, but feeling the pain of it gone. 

 

“Can I be frank with you?” Changmin asks, moving his head to look up at Kevin. Kevin nods, one hand coming to run through the younger’s hair again. “Of course you can,” Kevin says, smiling. “You can tell me anything Minnie, you know that.”

 

Changmin laughs a little and takes a deep breath, looking down at his socked feet and Kevin’s slippers. “I didn’t run away from you because I didn’t like you.” Kevin is silent, knowing Changmin has more to say. 

 

“I’m more scared than anything else,” he starts, resting his forehead right where Kevin’s heart is. He can feel the heartbeat, and it’s comforting.  “Scared of myself, scared of the future, scared of losing the most important person in my life if things go bad.” Changmin can feel tears pooling in his eyes, but he keeps them in. 

 

Kevin places a hand on top of his head and keeps it there. Changmin is not the one to be vulnerable. He is always a constant positive force in the group, and the only people he opens up to are Kevin, Jacob, and Chanhee, his best friend after Kevin. He knows Changmin needs to do this, so he does what he does best, and listens. 

 

“Kevin Moon, I have been in love with you since before I knew what it meant,” Changmin confesses, this time making direct eye contact with Kevin. “That’s 21 years of wanting to be so wrapped up in your presence that I suffocate in it. Being in a relationship, it ending, losing you, it could break me. 

 

“If being friends meant that I keep you in my life as a constant presence, then I would have nothing else,” Changmin says, clenching his eyes shut. 

 

Time is infinite, Changmin thinks. Infinite, though can also be entirely based on perspective. What is infinite to someone? A second? A trillion of seconds? How does one define infinity? Forever is a terrifying concept. It’s permanent, laid in solid stone and never to be erased. Changmin is more so intimidated by the thought of forever, because forever is also based on perspective. Forever means so much to different people, and forever is more so the experience you have. You cherish what you thought was forever. 

 

Kevin is infinity and forever fused into one sentient being. He is a second, a trillion of seconds passing by Changmin in a blink of an eye. He is forever, permanent, set in solid stone and never to be erased. He is what Changmin cherishes as forever. Kevin is his life’s experience of being in love. 

 

Kevin raises Changmin’s chin to look up at him, and he stares into Changmin’s eyes. It’s like he’s trying to read Changmin’s words, see what he is thinking. They are usually on the same wavelength, but this time, it’s a whole different spectrum. 

 

“Ji Changmin, you are never going to lose me,” Kevin states firmly, keeping the contact. “Even if we break up, what makes you think I could ever leave your side? I can’t stay away from you. It’s ironic, actually; I’m the one with Moon in my name, but now I feel like the tide, being drawn to shore by you.” Kevin gets closer to Changmin to the point where they’re mingling breaths. 

 

“We have forever,” Kevin whispers, rubbing Changmin’s jawline. “Forever isn’t time, it’s a person, and you are my forever.”

 

Time is infinite, Changmin knows. He knows infinity is based on perspective as well, because as Kevin places his lips on Changmin’s own, this, he realizes, is what forever is.

**Author's Note:**

> kevkyu or die
> 
> i honestly wrote this all in one sitting which is insane because ive had NO motivation to do anything but the muse comes when it comes i suppose
> 
> i kind of word vomited so idk if it flows SUPER well but i had fun writing it and thats what matters
> 
> hope you enjoy!! follow me on twitter: @chngmic


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